The Long Walk: A Story of War and the Life That Follows

The review is based on the audiobook, as are all of the other titles referenced except for Tim O'Brien's books. I am a clinical psychologist, Vietnam era veteran and Gulf War era veteran. I have always been a psychologist in the military - in fact, always a clinical psychologist (going on 42 years) since I left grad school with a PhD. I have never been deployed, though I interned at Letterman Army Hospital in 1970-1971. I saw many Vietnam returnees there, but really only one for any kind of therapy. I served at Fort Gordon, GA from 1971 through the end of 1977 (There I interviewed and administered an objective psychological test to 24 returning POWs.), left the Army for the Augusta, GA VA until October 1982, when I reentered service in the Air Force and retired August 1993 into a private practice. All this background for perspective. It wasn't until the late 1980s that I began to see men in my practice who would talk in any detail about their experience in Vietnam; it was not easy to hear, but I learned from it and became a credible therapist. For years, most RVN vets only talked with other vets because they thought no one else would understand (and they were probably at least partially right). Over the years they have taught me more, one in giving me a rather graphic description of real fear that I won't go into here. It has been only in the last several years that many vets began to write about RVN, and mostly in novels. Tim O'Brien's 4 books are excellent; one that appeared by title unrelated to the war was the story of a man haunted by his memories of the My Lai massacre. Nelson DeMille builds a couple of his novels around Vietnam, where he served as a young lieutenant in 1968. Karl Marlantes Matterhorn is excellent and written from experience in the infantry. I have seen Iraq, Gulf War, and Afghanistan vets since not long after the beginning of these conflicts. None of the accounts that I have heard approach The Long Walk and Outlaw Platoon, both memoirs from very different perspectives and different roles written by 2 officers who nonetheless give equally graphic accounts. These books should be required reading for those treating war returnees. I marvel at these men for being able to give these personal accounts, especially Brian Castner for being able to read his own book, and well. While I often hear vets say that when the bullets start flying, you are not fighting for your country but for your buddies, all of these books bring it home in moving and poignant ways. I was initially a little put of by the stream of consciousness, bouncing back and forth from Iraq to home, I think it works well to highlight how the war experience carries over on return home. I bought the print version so I could read his list of "triggers" and the account of dressing his son for a hockey game. I did not really like the "crazy" until he added the various aspects of the crazy. By the way, I disagree with the therapist he quotes as saying that he did not have PTSD. Maybe he has come to terms with it now, but he definitely had it. I think failure to diagnose based on absence of a couple of hallmark symptoms is an error. I do not believe ANYONE comes back from war the same or unscathed. I have often called PTSD "the gift that keeps on giving". I witnessed a WW II vet recall an experience with Patton's Army after the invasion with tears rolling down his cheeks after almost 40 years. Brian Castner and Sean Parnell have much to teach us about the horror of war from "up close and personal". They have added a deeper layer to my understanding of the brutality of such wars. I would also recommend Fearless and The Red Circle for an understanding of the incredible training (and resolve, bravery, and endurance) that elite soldiers like Special Forces and SEALs go through. Whether we agree on the wisdom of entering such conflicts, we must admire and support those who have served, died, and/or returned maimed physically and psychologically.

Brian Castner's "The Long Walk: A Story of War and the Life That Follows" is his memoir of three tours of duty in Iraq, two of them as the commander of an Explosive Ordnance Disposal unit, and his life after coming home, dealing with "the Crazy."Here are the first few paragraphs of the book:* * *"THE FIRST THING you should know about me is that I’m Crazy."I haven’t always been. Until that one day, the day I went Crazy, I was fine. Or I thought I was. Not anymore."My Crazy is a feeling. It’s the worst, most intolerable feeling I’ve ever had. And it never goes away."When you’re Crazy, you make a list of people you have told, the people you have come out to. My list is small. One best friend but not another. Jimbo and John and Greg, but not the other guys on the team. Your wife but not your mother. Those that you think will get it, will understand."And now I’m telling you. That I’m Crazy, and I don’t know why."The second thing you should know about me is that I don’t know how to fix it. Or control it. Or endure from one moment to the next. The Crazy is winning."So I run."I run every day, twice a day sometimes, out the front door of my peaceful suburban home, past sticky blast scenes of sewage, and motor oil, and bloody swamps of trash and debris, ankle deep, filling the road, sidewalks, shop and house doorsteps. I run through dust clouds, blown in off the desert or kicked up by the helo rotor wash. I run past the screaming women that never shut up, don’t shut up now. I should have made them stop when I had a chance. I run as fast as I can, as long as I can, my feet hitting the pavement in a furious rhythm, along the river near my home."I run in the hottest part of the day, the full afternoon blaze, the heat of the black asphalt, baking in the summer sun, rising through my shoes and into my feet. I speed up, but the Crazy feeling is still winning. It overwhelms. Sweat pours down my flushed face, in my eyes. Albietz is chalk white skin and brown dried blood from head to toe."* * *Aside from "Johnny Got His Gun," "Catch-22," and "Slaughterhouse-Five" (all novels, although Vonnegut based his novel on his experience as a POW), I am not a huge fan of the war genre in literature, fiction or non-fiction.Fortunately, I gave this book a chance. A friend of mine highly recommended Castner's memoir last Friday, I bought it that same day, and finished it this morning (one week later). It is without doubt one of the most engrossing memoirs I have ever read, and with no ghost writer it is exceptionally well-written and constructed.The sentences are often short, almost staccato, and Castner uses an image ("the foot in the box") as a hook throughout the text that seems at first part of his PTSD and then is revealed - in an unexpected way - that sheds light on the theme of the memoir.There are a lot of action scenes set in Iraq, in the field, doing their jobs - all of which are riveting because of the imminent threat of death, and made even more so through the writing style. But there is also humor, brief glimpses of joy, yoga, and the daily battle with "the Crazy."This is a book, in many ways, about men working with men in a predominantly male world. Yet I think the women who love the men who have served in Iraq might better understand their men through this book.This is also one of the best examples of combat-induced post-traumatic stress disorder that I have seen in a memoir. It would be nice if all of the politicians and generals who send our kids into war would read this book and take seriously the trauma that even a non-combat job can inflict on these young men.Highly recommended - this was an Amazon Best Book for 2012.

Excellent book,read it in two days,It not only describes the danger faced by these brave men,but also how people at home do not understand that serving soldiers in whatever war-zone cannot just switch-off from their memories when they return.As a former soldier who served in Belfast,during the troubles in the early 70s.I can understand the reasons that can lead to his dark times, which are now called post traumatic stress disorder.

This is an excellent book, and shows what EOD Technicians go through duringtheir tours in Iraq and elsewhere. I would recommend it to any sceptics who say weor our American partners shouldn't be in Iraq/Afghanistan.

This book tells a very impressive story that is worth it every single minute. It is a must if you like the military way of life.

delivered as advertised

Everyone will have different ideas about this book, I was taken in on some chapters and couldnt put it down, other times I had to skip over pages as they didnt make any sense. Im the type that will start a book and read it through in a day or two, this book took me a week to get through.